6 Things You Didn't Know About Home Birth

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“You are SO brave – I could never handle that much pain!” “Aren’t you nervous? That sounds dangerous!” “Is it stressful to have that mess in your house?” ” I think I need to see how my first birth goes before considering a home birth.”

These are just a few of the most common questions and comments I’ve heard over the last 5 years and 4 wonderfully successful home births. Some of them are funny to me, and at the same time, I had many of the same thoughts running through my head up until the third trimester of pregnancy with my oldest child. That’s when I decided most of my concerns didn’t actually matter and I wanted to have a home birth.

I honestly can’t overestimate how glad I am that my husband and I made that decision! I truly believe our midwives and birth methods have played a critical role in the health of our family, which affects everything else.

Disclaimer: This is not medical advice. Any claims are based on my own experience. You should consult with your own doctor or midwife before making any home birth decisions.

Why We Decided On Home Birth (Even Though I Was Nervous at First)

When I first found out I was pregnant with our oldest, I knew almost nothing. I had heard of home birth and had one or two friends that did it, but I didn’t think that was something I’d want to try, at least for my first child (who knows what will happen?!).

As the pregnancy progressed, I became increasingly uncomfortable with all of the medical interventions my OB wanted to push. And how they couldn’t even answer my questions about most of them (if you ever want to make a doctor squirm, ask for a vaccine insert – not just the 1 sheet of paper they hand out). But we live 30 minutes away from the closest hospital, and what if something went wrong?!

I decided to explore the option of a home birth anyway. I asked questions to every acquaintance I knew that might have any experience. We met with a midwife and I told her I’d try one or two appointments but wasn’t sure yet. I read books.

We decided to go for it, and the rest of the pregnancy (which was only 12 weeks!) I thought, “I hope these ladies know what they’re doing!”

Boy, was I surprised when it was time for my daughter to be born. The birth was quick, so peaceful, and I felt SO much more cared for and safe than I ever imagined. I just remember having absolutely no fear when they were there.

Fast forward to child #4, and I’d venture to say that every birth has almost gotten easier.

(Full disclosure, we did have a scare with #2 – meconium aspiration – and were in the NICU for a week. Thankfully, *I* felt great through the process, even tromping through the hospital twice a day starting the day after birth, thanks to such an otherwise easy birth! Now, I think he just may be our healthiest child!)

If you’re considering a home birth, here are 6 things you didn’t know – and should!

6 Things You Didn’t Know About Home Birth

1. It’s Not Nearly As Painful As People Think

This is one of the top comments I get when people hear we do home births. “Wow, I could never do that! I couldn’t take the pain!”

In actuality, home birth allows you to work WITH your body instead of having “helpful” interventions working against your body as you give birth – making the process much less painful than mamas who have birthed in the hospital tend to think. 🙂

For example, while epidurals can mask some of the pain of labor, they also tend to make labor last longer and can make it harder to push.

Ina May Gaskin’s Sphincter Law also explains how the body’s sphincters (excretory, cervical, and vaginal) function best when the mother feels comfortable and safe – and where better than in the comfort of one’s own home?

Not to mention birthing on your back works against gravity, puts pressure on major blood vessels, reduces the baby’s oxygen flow, limits natural pain management methods (like rocking, movement, and water birth), and makes it more difficult for the baby to get in an optimal birthing position. (Here’s why women started giving birth on their backs.)

Sadly, the cascade of interventions that are all too common in hospital births can be made to sound necessary, but they tend to interfere with natural hormones that make pushing out a baby so much easier.

Although I’ve only ever experienced home births, my opinion is that the pain is SO much more manageable than people think. Giving birth in the comfort of your own home, with the focused attention of midwives, using a variety of pain management tools, in an optimal position for your body (which can change and probably will throughout the birth process), without drugs that interfere with the body’s own pain management methods not only makes birth much less painful than people think, but also sets your body up for an easier recovery.

(Just a few pain management techniques for home birth include water birth, massage, counter pressure, different positions and movement, and breathing techniques.)

2. You’ll Probably Get Way More Attention Than You Would In a Hospital

My third baby was taking her sweet time, and I was having contractions for over 12 hours that didn’t seem to be getting much closer together (which was quite a long time for me). Every time my midwife checked in, I told her not to come yet. They weren’t close enough and I knew it’d be a bit.

About 18 hours in, she decided she wanted to make sure everything was okay, so she drove over and checked on me. It was, of course! What did she do? Turn around and leave?

Nope, she took a nap in my backyard! (It was a beautiful, 80° day in April!) I just remember being inside, feeling still very much in early labor and not needing attention, thinking, “Would a doctor – who’s here ONLY for me – ever just lay down 20 feet away and wait for me to need her?! (When I’m totally fine??)”

Interestingly, our sweet girl came just a few hours later – I think my body knew my midwife was here and I was safe!

In every birth (some with one midwife and some with two – and two different midwife groups), I’ve been absolutely amazed at the focused attention I have from my midwives. Not only are they completely focused on me while they’re here, but they truly know me (we’ve spent a lot of time together by birth time!).

3. It’s Not That Messy (& It’s Incredibly Peaceful)

Home birth is really so much less messy than most people think. Midwives have very effective strategies for keeping things reasonably clean – layered bed sheets with a shower curtain in between, chux pads, plastic on the floor (if needed), etc. Plus, all of our midwives have been amazing at cleaning up after births! They leave us in a clean bed, start the laundry, and take out the trash.

Of course, some births are a little louder, faster, or messier than others, but all in all, home birth is a very peaceful experience!

Related Reading: How to Prepare for a Home Birth

4. Your Home Is Way More Comfortable Than a Hospital (And Might Mean An Easier Birth)

One of the funniest things about home birth is how much DADS love it after having a child in the hospital and then another child at home. We have had countless dad friends tell us how much they love home birth! But the comfort is definitely for everyone!

For most women, there’s no place we feel safer than in our own bedroom in our own home. There’s no worrying about packing up your belongings and getting in a car, no stress about traffic or how full the hospital will be, no hard, dirty floors filled with other people’s germs. You get to be in your own bed (or bathtub, shower, or floor…), with all of your own “stuff”, with only people you know and trust!

Related Reading: Baby Registry Checklist for Minimalists and Small Houses

And when the midwives leave, you’re already home!

Remember, feeling safe also tends to contribute to a less painful birth, too!

5. You Can Do a Home Birth With Your First Child!

This is a myth that I fell for for the first two trimesters of my first birth – that I couldn’t do a home birth with my first child because I didn’t know how it would go (and we’re 30 minutes from the hospital).

What I did not realize at first is that birth is a very natural process that is typically not a health emergency. In MOST cases, home birth is actually quite safe – no less risky than a hospital birth with trained midwives.

In addition, your midwife most likely won’t advise you to attempt a home birth if you’re considered high risk or if she doesn’t feel it’s a safe situation.

6. You’re Not a Superhero (But Your Midwives Are)

Home birth is absolutely amazing. But it’s also a very normal physiological event that women have been doing for thousands of years!

Having a home birth doesn’t make you any better, tougher, or stronger than anyone who has had a hospital birth. In fact, it’s probably actually much easier than going through a hospital birth.

Midwives are the real heroes!